The Darkness Before Dawn - A Lesson In Pursuing Our Dreams

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I did intend on posting Part Two of my previous post What Is Magic? But something else came up which I thought I would share while it's still fresh on my mind. 

While practicing a more positive lifestyle, one negative little thing came up. It was tiny but it was also distracting. I knew I needed to deal with it but I didn't think too much about it.

A couple of days later, all hell broke loose.

I was out with my youngest daughter and as we got off the bus a man turned to us and said, "I've been told to bless you. Happy new year."

Wow, how nice was that I said to my little girl.

Well, now I can only think this man was either an angel or had a direct line to heaven because of what happened next.

We made our way to the shop we wanted to go to and in the distance a man was shouting. Just as we approached the corner of the street, another man in a car calmly told us not to carry on as there was a man out of his mind with a knife. I looked round and saw him. I didn't think much of it at the time but thankfully he had his back to us. We were the closest people to him. Calmly, I told my daughter we needed to get out of there.

Thank God for the man in the car!

Next, our bus didn't show up....neither did the next. A huge crowd formed and the atmosphere became tense. We were told the next bus wouldn't leave until at least 20 minutes. So I decided to jump on another that stops a good thirty minute walk from home.

But, because it was pitch black and an unfamiliar route we got off two stops early so the walk home in the bitter cold was longer. 

Once home, my new neighbours were once again shouting obscenities at their young children. It was then I broke down at the relentless barrage of stress. I mean I didn't even have a moment to recover from our encounter with the knife wielding man. 

I decided to go to a party I had been invited to to let down my hair. Although it was a good night, I did drink but soon came to regret even that.

The next day I lay in bed thinking what the hell happened these past couple of days? And I believe I got my answer. 

Or answers I should say....

First, I heard in my heard 'It's always darkest before dawn.' As I contemplated those words, it gave me a glimmer of hope to not despair or give up on all the hard work I have put in.

Second, I knew I had some choices to make. Give up the things that were not serving me. Identify areas that drained me. And so on. Things that weren't bad, but were bad for me.

Then Oprah's speech came out. I listened to those words and as soon as she said there's nothing more powerful than speaking 'Our truth', something I talk about and believe, I understood right there and then, that in order to live our truth, we would have to learn hard ones about ourselves.

In order for me to be able to move forward, I would have to change a few things. I had told myself a lie that certain things were okay in my life because I could handle them. Well, the truth is I can't.

That includes the simplest things such as indulging in negative pointless conversations. Recreational drinking. Excessive time on Facebook.

Each one of these is a massive drain on my life and opens doors to a whole lot of crap!

Evidence of the hold that these things have on me is the difficulty of giving them up. 

So, in order to LIVE our truth, we may need to discover some things about ourselves that we didn't know. Things we need to clear out of the way to make room for something better.

And that's the thing. In order to also receive our desires, we have to get rid of things that have a hold on us or drain us. But we won't always see what those things are. They may only be revealed in that darkest hour before the breaking of dawn.

We can mistake hardships as a 'no' to our dreams.

Well, I believe that's not the case. Our hardships are lessons in growth and preparations in making room for better things.

I didn't want to give up, but I didn't want to go on either, until I saw what it all meant. And It will only mean something if I became pro-active about it and apply what I learned. 

So now I have some new intentions. My schedule now changes. My decisions about certain things must change too. And as I do that, finally the light of dawn will shine! 

What Is Magic? Part One

You need to become aware of the magic that surrounds you: magic that is life, magic that is God, magic that is in the green trees and the red flowers, magic that is in people’s eyes. Magic is happening everywhere! All is miraculous...And then creativity will come to you, things will start happening on their own. Your heart will start pouring songs of joy, your hands will start transforming things. You will touch mud and it will become a lotus. You will be able to become an alchemist. But it is possible only through great awakening of intelligence, great awakening of the heart. - OSHO

Ever since I can remember I have had a fascination for all things magical, other-worldly, and spiritual. I've always believed there is more than what our eyes perceive. As a child we are encouraged in these things by way of using our imagination.

But somewhere, between childhood and adulthood, we are then told to stop with such nonsense. Ironically, the word nonsense basically means 'no sense' and therefore what our senses cannot perceive must then be attributed as false and therefore unbelievable. We are encouraged in one world then told that we can no longer remain there and must abide by the rules of the adult world. The story of Peter pan comes to mind here and I can understand why J.M.Barrie wrote that story.

For a long long time the child within held all things magical in her heart searching for ways to express it in the world of adulthood. The only ways I saw it being expressed though were in story, whether that of books or movies. But my desire was to see how magic, the very thing we were taught and encouraged in, could be lived out and transform not only our lives, but the world. 

Magic, the word itself, for centuries has been mostly ascribed to witches. Even mentioning that word today brings to mind, for some, witchcraft. But that's not the meaning I'm implying when I use that word. When I use it, I'm talking about the things that make no sense to the world we know today. Today, people are disillusioned. As a result, they are anxious, negative, pessimistic and expect the worst. For example, the phone rings and immediately they think its a cold call. Or a letter comes through the door and it must be a bill. 

Magic is about awe, wonder, excitement, anticipation, belief in something amazing happening, adventure and so on. Magic is making things happen. You may have heard the quote;

Make your own magic.

 That is something we learned as children but must be applied again as adults. Children always make the most out of a bad situation, especially with friends. Children forgive easily and quickly. Children's imagination knows no bounds. These are merely foundations to making your own magic but they are things we need to re-learn. And before we can even do that we must unlearn a bunch of crap we've been taught to believe to replace all that in order to survive in this world. 

I don't want to pretend to be someone I'm not in order to please others. I want embrace all of life and invite miracles into my life. As the quote at the start says;

All is miraculous...And then creativity will come to you, things will start happening on their own.

My goal is to come to that point where magic happens...'as you seek you will find'. Where things start to happen as if on their own. That is magic!