Monday, 11 February 2019

Braving It To Dance To The Beat Of Your Own Drum

When we pay attention, and by paying attention I mean be aware of the bigger picture in life, we notice things. We can be guided by whichever higher power you personally identify with. Meaningful signs appear to you just at the right time to get your attention, followed by something that speaks directly into your life. 

This is what happened to me recently. I had been going through a really challenging time. I was being misunderstood. I'd say something that was taken the wrong way, which then threatened insecurities to raise their ugly head. Fortunately, the lesson I had begun to learn, which I wrote about in my last post, kicked in. I knew I had to stand for what I believed in and what was good for me. And I had so many signs to guide me along the way.

Saying no, I was misunderstood. I genuinely didn't want to upset the person I was saying no to, but I knew I couldn't say yes, for a multitude of reasons. The list for no outweighed the one for yes. Unfortunately, the other person took my no to mean more than it did and she parted ways.

This left me with a lot to process. Do I fight my corner and try to explain that's not what I meant? If I respect their decision and back off without a fight, would they understand one day? I don't know.

So I respectfully backed away without putting up a fight.

However, I did know this was not actually my battle. I was secure in my decision, but it had taken me years to get to this point in my life. To be secure enough to say no when I knew a no was absolutely necessary. 

The following week, there was an explosion of opportunities and good news. It was like I had opened up space for all these things...

Which got me thinking...

How much do we close ourselves off to when we people please? When we say yes when what we really want to say is no? 

Not only do we lose out on what could be, we become less ourselves and more them. Our light dims and we no longer shine. 

The thing is, you are here for a reason. You are unique. You are loved and the world needs us to shine. Shining is not to be confused with trying to please everyone. We are all imperfectly perfect...our honest expressions of ourselves done even in love will set off others' insecurities. But that's not your fault. It's not even theirs. They've just yet to learn about themselves and grow.

Another lesson, which I'll write separately about, is having the strength to remove yourself from toxic environments. We can be so narrow minded and rooted in a small space, that we think that's all there is. Which makes leaving it harder. But when you see that there's a big, big world out there, it makes the decision easier. Again, though, you will be misunderstood. But if you stay out of fear of being misunderstood, you miss out on so much that is waiting for you, not to mention you even lose yourself!

And life is too short for that!

I may, at the time of writing, be completely misunderstood by a few. But it makes me stronger in myself. I shine more brightly. I do see things from their perspective, because I've been there. Although I choose not to put up a fight, I am fighting by just being me and staying true to my decisions, knowing that one day, some of those people will get it and may indeed go through the very same process for themselves. 

And for those people, my door is kept open.

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